Emotional Prison?!

Well, that sounds pretty serious, eh?

It's the time of the year when the carnival comes to Landsdowe Mall. We've been going there every year since 2002. Nope, not for the games, nor the snacks. But for tarot card/palm reading.

So how does that relate to our wedding u ask?
Let's say I have nothing better to ask, so I sort of thinking about what will I do and how's thing going be with Mark when I shuffle the cards.
I'm glad that I was specific about the question this time...coz last time her reading was vague becoz of my overly general question. Hahaha, I've learnt my lesson. =)

I'm not gonna type the whole reading here, not in our wedding blog. But I'm willing to share this "Emotional Prison" idea from my reading.
I was pretty surprised to have been told that I'm in this Emotional Prison when I think of myself being quite calm these days. I couldn't agree on that idea and then the tarot card reader explained a bit more about this states...she said it could be me not wanting to hurt others feeling or some elderly figures (my dad, etc) telling me what to do.
In that case, yes.

I've always wanted to please everyone. And with that thought, I'm always torned between what others and myself want.

Like planning this wedding. Even though it was a simple one, there's still some basic traditional chinese custom to follow.

Mark and I don't want to serve alcohol at our banquet. Firstly, becoz I don't like alcohol. Secondly, our families/most friends don't drink. Thirdly, I don't want our guest to DUI. But then my aunt said quite firmly about "There has to be alcohol at banquet with this chinese saying...喜酒， has to have 酒 for celebration".
I'm just not strong enough to stand my ground even though it's my wedding.

This is only a tip of the iceberg.

I was gonna donate to BCSPCA in lieu of favor. It's meaningful to me and I think it's better than guest bringing home somethings that's gonna sit around the house with no functional use. But once again, my idea got rejected beoz of not actually giving favor to guest. I was sad to acknowledge that tradition is more important than having a good heart and doing a good deed. Somehow, they don't understand that.
I still want to make a donation to BCSPCA, at the same time I'll have to give out FAVOR too.

I'm frustrated. Why do I have to be THAT considerate? I should be a Bridezilla~

Mark keeps telling me..."we can't please everyone" and "we'r the ones who make the final decision".

Easy to say, Hard to do.

I guess I'll be in my emotional prison for awhile.